I imagine there’s going to be a ton of disappointed people suckered in by the title of this entry…
This year I celebrate 40 years of crossdressing and HOLY FUCKNUTS WHAT THE WHAT NOW???
Well, I can certainly say it’s been 40 years since I first saw the thing that inspired me to start crossdressing: Return of the Jedi, specifically Carrie Fisher in that bikini, compelled me at the age of six to wait until my parents went to bed at night before crawling out of my own and trying to recapture that look using a rolled-up vest, a towel for a skirt, and welly boots.
Eh; it was a start…
The last time I talked about this, in a bit more detail, was ten years ago here. I’ll spare you my opinions of the franchise – let’s just say I always found it a mixed bag [cough those two Ewok movies cough] and my nostalgia’s been doing more heavy lifting lately.
These days my crossdressing is fuelled by a lot more experience and a far more expansive wardrobe collection. I can do swimsuits, but bikinis elude me. And all this is still something I feel obliged to keep hidden from my parents (ho-hum).
I’ve done various bits of cross-dressed cosplay before – Star Trek, Wonder Woman, Tomb Raider amongst others – but hadn’t thought about Star Wars until after acquiring a pair of cheap lightsabers. And with a choice of going to the light side or the dark side, I could take two bites at this cherry.
Trouble is, I’m a complete shameless tart, and Jedi tend towards modest robes. I think there was one blue-skinned background Jedi in the prequels who went around in a sports bra and leggings, but I had to find some other way to adapt the look into something a bit more my style: I bought a cheap-shit robe, cheap-shit tunic and cheap-shit shiny brown leggings online, and hoped for the best.
And when I say “I think there was one background character…” I know perfectly damn well what her name is, how she dies, her exotic accent (kinda French), and the game where you can play as her and cut down battle droids. I’m a massive fucking nerd, but I was trying to play it cool for a second.
For playing a baddie, it’s much easier: black and shiny. Well, I’ve got the catsuit and boots already, but to get a bit more variety and texture I got some cheap-shit shiny lingerie to put over it. It seemed to do the business.
The bad girls in Star Wars are usually ‘Inquisitors’, with names along the lines of ‘the third/fourth/fifth sister’. I reckon I could dip into the namesake band one of my writing buddies named me after: my dark side character can be ‘the twisted sister’…
I figured it’d be good to get two contrasting locations for the two characters: Jedi are all about life, so a forest seemed the best place to illuminate. I found a quiet scrap of trees next to Edinburgh’s dry ski slope that would fit the bill.
For the evil shots, I wanted some place that looked barren and rocky. There’s a spot at North Berwick where the sand and rocks look like a cheap film set from an old sci fi show, but I can assure you all that it’s a real place and it was bloody freezing too.
You can practise this when negotiating Edinburgh’s streets during the summer festivals.
Naturally there were dozens of photos taken in order to get the handful that stood out (with the help of a very patient friend who’s also an excellent photographer), not to mention all the practice shots beforehand (I did these by myself to figure out practicalities).
I’m just glad I didn’t have to Photoshop anything: the settings and the colours from the blades were all I needed.
Have to say, I’m really happy with the way they turned out!
Miss Twist speaks her brains 