Stirling stuff, this… (NB, this is combined from two photos to get me and the castle in focus.)
All aboard the Twist train?
If modelling involves putting on a look of studied indifference, then …I’m still practising…
Sunrise is a time to reflect…
If only boarding queues were as short as the dress…
This is how I exercise at the weekend. How about you?
Och, hills! Ochil Hills! Och!
I colour-match the Scottish border.
I have a great sense of stile.
This wind farm is the future! And it annoys Donald Trump! What’s not to like?
My tits are fake, but they don’t jiggle like Pamela’s did…
Lighthouses warn off ships. I do my best to attract them. The ships ended up going in circles.
Sing when you’re whinnying?
Boldly going forwards ’cause we can’t find reverse…
Reasons to be cheerful?
…or Princess of Power? You decide!
See Edinburgh Castle from Castle Street. (No idea how it got that name.)
Footsore from high heels? Find something to lean on…
Happy chocolate egg day!
I was so hungry I started eating my clothes from the other end.
This is a space I invaded…
Yee-haw, y’all!
Damn, I love these shiny leggings…
Je m’appell Madame Torsion; ivre avant le lever su soleil, moi? Mais oui!
Wanted posters were always phrased a little ambiguously…
Airport security screens out makeup, perfume, and other toiletries. Just what kind of terrorists are they looking for?
Time to cool my jets?
(Waves hello)
Some days you get lucky with the view…
Looks like the warrior princess is a bit of a worrier too…
This is actually right outside a hotel’s breakfast room…
What should a cross-dresser do with their sack?
You can tell we’re living in the future because we can wear clothes that light up…
You’ll notice I’m kneeling in a paddling pool; there’s no way I was jumping into the one behind me.
You can swim in it too…
For swingers?
Pink and purple? My eyes!!!
In which I do my physical dance mime theatre interpretation of a tree.
I wanted to find an exercise that would lift everything. EVERYTHING.
I have no idea what the numbers on CCG cards mean…
People pass by without batting an eyelid… when you’re out trying to give them flyers.
This is me trying to smile despite all the early-morning water beasties skittering over my toes.
Smoke machines, funky lighting and a projector can make anything look epic…
Posing with a posie
Whatever you do in life, feel epic doing it.
Minimal photoshopping required…
I’m just amazed I could squeeze into this sucker.
I think this captures the *moment* the guy on the left has figured me out… 🙂 (Dress by Psychomoda; photo by Reverine Photography.)
You just stick your thumb and and hitch a ride – that’s how trains work, isn’t it? *dress from Psychomoda
Scottish summertime…
These massive purple books at Alnwick Castle co-ordinate well with my clothes.
Contrived? Set up? Whatever could you mean?
I don’t actually work out; I just like wearing lycra… 😛
Skirt by Psychomoda
Shiny dress; groovy shadow – I guess I’m a 60’s chick at heart?
The 80s were… a different time.
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
This is the look you want when listening to 80’s power ballads.
After coming out, go out!
Photo by Duncan Holmes Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
We drove all the way to Inversnaid waterfall to do a photoshoot, only to find it had been barricaded…
Smells like Twist spirit?
Wearing a PVC catsuit on the hottest day of the year results in a waterfall when you take it off…
My home town has some great scenery…
In which I rush to save a jellyfish from drowning.
Things to do on a summer holiday…
Well, shoot!
It was like that when I got there…
There is nowhere to hide in a dress this tight…
Scottish weather is reliably dismal.
Pretty, thin, and graceful: that bridge is everything I aspire to be. (Apart from the bit about traffic running over me, obviously…)
If philosopher David Hume knew people would rub the toe of his statue for luck, he’d turn in his grave…
In which I dominate this funky red couch.
Fluffy the snake and I got on really well.
Sorting out my hair, because that’s what people will be looking at first… right?
This is an attention-getting little number…
As emcee, I completely fail at surreptitiously checking the time on my phone…
For the sake of glamour, let’s pretend this was taken somewhere warm and tropical…
Yes, it was bloody freezing when I took this photo.
Arty-farty photoshopping based on some epic concept art I saw a while back.
Sea. This. Rocks.
Dress by Psychomoda.
Pretending to be awestruck by a fluorescent light…
If Einstein can do photos sticking out his tongue, so can I.
Tarlair Lido has seen better days…
I much prefer speaking without a mic…
I don’t always hang around on street corners, but when I do…
Cue the blistering electric cello solo…
They repair stiletto heels here too.
Do I look cold? I felt cold.
I’m amazed I could squeeze into this dress… *dress from Psychomoda
Anywhere can look exotic if you get the right angle…
When all else fails, keep partying!
Don’t need Dan Brown to figure out this imagery…
Despite appearances, this isn’t a nuclear reactor; it’s a water treatment facility…
The loch didn’t cool me down; I warmed it up.
The new castle in Newcastle looks quite old…
I live near some epic architecture…
Nessie tells me her flat Earth theory; I am sceptical…
This is more uncomfortable than it looks…
I was hungry, all right?!
Uh, just realised there’s a boat with ‘KY’ right next to my backside; you shouldn’t read anything into this.
Photo by Reverine Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
Fluffy the snake was a gentleman. (At least, until he decided to plunge his head between my tits… oh, wait…) *Dress by Psychomoda
Bringing a bit of colour to…. uh, never mind.
I’m a good-weather kinda gal.
Some people live in great-looking little houses.
There can be only one! (Skirt by Psychomoda.)
Sand gets everywhere. EVERYWHERE. *(photoshopped)
The hills are alive with the sound of turnips.
Shiny – let’s be bad guys.
Rise and shiny?
This is where princes and princesses learn stuff and shiz…
I’m so bad at snooker, I can’t even hold the cue properly…
I extend my pinkie because I’m evil.
Say it with flowers…
Out in the Scottish countryside…
French tart or criminal mastermind? You decide!
I try to catch lightning in that bottle…
Like Lara Croft, I have unfeasibly large bosoms, I am constantly looking for keys, and I am pretty much uncontrollable.
…because bunnies are renowned for… uh, laying eggs…
Cloak and dagger. The dagger may or may not be a euphmism for something.
About to get west and wild…
If you need an engineering pin-up model, clearly I’m your girl…
Imagine…
Nothing like a stroll in the park to get you going…
A water treatment plant. The smile is forced.
Another dress that requires me to suck in my stomach…
Man, that’s some good hayfever
Utterly bladdered; newt-like; pissed up on booze. If it wasn’t for the umbrella, I’d be on my face.
Dainty, isn’t it? (The village, I mean…)
Thought this was a derelict windmill at first…
Trying very hard not to fall backwards into the sea…
Through the castle door in Transexual Transylvaniaaaaa…
Me with an impressive erection. …what?! It’s not *mine*! Jesus, you people. It’s named after a guy called… *checks notes* …Willy.
Inspired by the Greek myth of Andromeda. And bondage.
Work of art! And so’s that shit behind me.
Stone circle or stargate? You decide!
This pool was ancient, decrepit, manky, and full of sea critters. The smile is fake.
The classic ‘call down lightning from the heavens’ pose. (Skirt by Psychomoda.)
…because cross-dressing is an adventure (sometimes).
The balls are hidden. …oh, what?
Yet another windy day…
Fancy visiting The Pends? It Depends.
You have to cock it before use. (The gun, I mean.)
I accidentally double-dipped my chest… 
Brace yourselves; Twist is coming. (You’ll know when I come…)
Photo by Duncan Holmes Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
Shit! I’m late for my bus!
Three seconds later in a gust of wind, I Marilyn Monroe’d everyone in the roof garden.
The Hogwarts sorting hat couldn’t decide about me…
It’s not easy being green. Especially with red eye.
It’s a bit windy up here…
This Easter Egg was gone in sixty seconds…
In which I bring a touch of Rocky Horror to Hogwarts…
It took about three years to realise this skirt had pockets; this captures the moment.
You get used to cobbles. Eventually.
I can pretend to be serene!
I went batshit with a purple filter here.
This was a friend’s photoshop challenge: multiple Twists playing Twister.
If you get up early enough, you can have a summer beach all to yourself…
I told him I don’t give Noss on a first date. He gave me a stony look. (There was no second date.)
Sitting on the Iron Throne for more than an hour at a time is not recommended…
I’m a long way from home here…
This pool has spent about 80 years getting smashed to bollocks by the North Sea.
Dumbarton rocks!
I bought myself a reward for the end of my road trip…
Yeah, maybe went a bit overboard in Photoshop here…
Slender, graceful, modern… I love wind farms.
This was a triumph…
Inspired by Tina Fey in Esquire: payload.cargocollective.com/1/3/108617/1413003/esquire_15_1000.jpg
Didn’t feel a thing.
Been seen to lean by a keen teen in jeans means I’m unclean?
This is a folly. (I mean, the incomplete neo-hellenic temple in the background…)
Pretending to be epic…
The loch didn’t make me cold; I heated it up. Physics, I defy you!
Steampunked
Kelpie statue or borg architecture?
The lightsabers are called ‘Woody’ and ‘Buzz’. Because Disney.
On any road trip, stretch your legs once in a while…
…oh, wait, I’m not supposed to do that, am I?
The hills are alive with the sound of …transvestites.
I can put on a show from time to time…
Buffy mucking about in the cemetery undergrowth…
I tried laughing therapy with a distraught girl. It didn’t work. (Doesn’t matter – had a good laugh anyway.)
This tiny fishing village was a location in the Avengers films…
*Heroic music swells* *like my chest*
Three-point-landings make everything epic. Especially in heels.
Because I’m classy that way.
Shy crossdresser? Try hillwalking!
Cheerleader Buffy doing a 3-point-landing in a graveyard. I don’t know how much more epic I can be for you people.
Heroic music swells. So does my chest.
Photo by Reverine Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
I’m a summertime kinda gal…
I dress like this every morning. And so should you.
On a twisting stair…
Photo by Reverine Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
I do cover up from time to time (but only if it’s appropriate…)
You have to be very rich to own a mansion you can paint the colour of Irn Bru…
Posing like this, instead of concentrating on the table, is why I tend lose snooker…
Stiletto heels and cobbles are not a good mix.
I colour co-ordinate with nature. Muthafuckaz.
This pose comes courtesy of my left foot sinking ankle-deep in wet sand.
Early morning at a quiet little harbour…
Managed to catch the only 10 minutes of sunshine!
Well… I’m here…
If I move away, the pillar falls over.
Hey, tits! I’m not a twitcher, though. Can’t jiggle at all, truth be told…
peekaboo!
“Is a 1955 departure the 24-hour clock, or the year?”
It’s like a Herbal Essences advert gone wrong.
Holy …!
Once you get over the fear of being seen in public, you might start craving the attention… (Dress by Psychomoda.)
When in doubt, add lens flares.
Nothing like a topical reference from the past to date your old photos…
Warrior princesses must make time to check their nails.
I’d never make it in a team.
…until the next time…
The movie version of this will be a sleeper hit. The game version will be a rail shooter.
I have mastered the single entendre
Pro tip: sunrise in the summer is the best time to get photos of Edinburgh Castle.
…in which I pretend to be clever…
The ‘Bonnet Stone’ is kinda groovy…
Spreading happiness, good cheer, chocolate, and myxomatosis…
Presented without comment… 😉
Shot my bolt?
Everyone should dress like this before sunrise.
(…this is actually a library fire exit!)
This was taken at 2am in October/November and it was FREEZING.
Charmed, I’m sure…
Four-inch heels are completely impractical for being a cartoon secret agent…
That’s actually Red Bull in the glass.
Spin on it?
I’m amazed my makeup survived the winter gardens…
Get your rocks off…
Fucking freezing.
Pause and reflect for a bit?
I thought the flowers on the dress would be good camouflage.
Action transvestite: running, jumping, climbing trees…
They’re great when you first put them on, but then they wrinkle. And they never stop squeaking.
Purple and green make a weird mix in pre-dawn light…
“We’re not flying; we’re falling with style!”
Sometimes you need sunshine to sparkle properly…
(You’d probably keep your door locked shut too…)
Second later, I Marilyn Monroe’d the rest of the loch…
No idea why I struck this pose, but it’s different.
In local vernacular, “Wha daur meddle wi’ me?!”
All I need is a Jaguar E-type and my image is set…
Of course it’s not a natural pose – not with that smile, anyway…
Is that a sword in your scabbard or are you just pleased to see me?
I’m blue dab-a-dee Aberdour, dab-a-dee Aberdour…
I live in a city with quaint villages right in the middle of it…
I live in a city with a multitude of creepy, overgrown graveyards.
Three colourful Edinburgh icons. (Fuck you; I’m an icon! In my head.)
Got to add some colour to the place!
On yr rocks, checkin out yr rockpoolz…
If you ever get the chance to do this, take it!
Home! (It’s rather windy…)
Creature of the night?
Worship me, muthafuckaz
Pew! Pew!
Twist on tha toon…
Nothing phallic about that tank at all. No, sirree.
I have a fertile imagination 😉
Spring in my step?
I love this dress; it’s stylish, classic and almost-but-not-quite too short…
Inspired by the Divine Presence, or yawning? You decide!* *(yawning.)
Epic lighting all caught in camera…
Where the hell am I?
Because clothes that light up are awesome. *Dress by Psychomoda
My eyes are up here…
If you want to pretend to be epic, find an epic location.
Vintage dress, vintage plane; both are a bit cramped for space…
October is a time of grave concern…
Expressing an early desire to do cheesy secret agent poses. Or something.
Going for that sporty look… in the middle of nowhere.
…when the revolution comes…
How short is that skirt?! …just short enough.
That’s a map of the Pentland Hills. I’m in Lomond Hills. No wonder I’m lost.
TRONsvestite on the run…
Let’s see you try holding this pose…
Early bird…
Sunrise tomb-raiding; the lens flare is real, btw.
Bringing a whole new meaning to the idea of ‘playing with myself’…
Everything about this picture says “Scottish cross-dresser”.
My body is a temple; it’s open on Sundays OH SHIT I DID NOT SAY THAT
This blog allows me to reflect on things.
Dundee’s newest, and second, attraction…
Sticking out my tongue at cameras was… uh, *is* a phase I’m going through.
The only spot on Dumbarton Rock without wind…
Going a bit nuts with the photoshop there…
Prancing around rock pools at Dunbar…
Action heroines always seem to end up mucking around industrial waste grounds…
Three-point landings make anything seem epic.
HELLO? YEAH, I’M AT LOCH NESS. IT’S VERY WINDY. NO, I SAID WINDY. AT LOCH NESS. HELLO? HELLO? FUCK IT, HERE’S SOME CLEAVAGE. I’M GOING NOW.
In which I speak brainily to Newcastle Skeptics about cross-dressing…
Got wood? *Dress by Psychomoda
I bet that gull had a great view.
Photo by Duncan Holmes Photography; dress by Psychomoda.
It’s not worth looking for hidden symbology in this photo…
I have precisely zero singing ability.
Cross-dressed Laserquest gets a bit warm…
I don’t like sand. It’s coarse, and rough, and irritating, and it gets everywhere…
The Trossachs in March: snowy enough to be pretty, but not so snowy I can’t drive there…
Turning over a new leaf?
